Rules of programming

There is always one more bug.

15. It is impossible to make any program foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

16. When things are going well, something will go wrong.

17. When things just can't get any worse, they will.

18. Anytime things appear to be going well, you have overlooked something.

19. Test functions and their tests should be reproducible -- they should all fail in the same way.

20. If it looks easy, it's tough.

21. You always find any bug in the last place you look.

Work quotes

I should really start going to bed earlier so I have more time in the morning to be late for work
 Sometimes it takes me more than eight hours to get nothing done.
We feel that your job performance would improve greatly if you just quit doing your job.
It's so quiet in the office today, I can hear myself not working
Procastinator? No. I just wait until the last second to do my work because I will be older, therefore wiser.
 Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.--Sam Ewing
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working when you get up in the morning, and doesn't stop until you get to the office.--Robert Frost
 Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.--Leslie Nielsen

Graduation

"Bachelor's degrees make pretty good placemats if you get 'em laminated." --Jeph Jacques

Cookies!

One billion dollars

in stacked hundred dollar bills.


http://www.stupidcalculations.com/blog/2013/5/22/calculation-n-4

More serious...

"The sun shines and warms and lights us and we have no curiosity to know why this is so; but we ask the reason of all evil, of pain, and hunger, and mosquitoes and silly people." --Ralph Waldo Emerson